A LETTER TO MYSELF

“If you had it all to do over,  would you fall in love with yourself again”

 

We all are happy to receive letters….. aren’t we? Though the days are gone now, taken over by technology, the posts that we used to receive are rarely seen. Times have changed, hand-written letters have transformed to emails. But that can’t stop anyone who still want to write. So why not write one to yourself when there is nobody to do so. And when in future you read it to yourself it will bring joy and happiness. We can all do that. At any age reading the same letter will always bring back some reaffirmation every time. Being nice to oneself, loving and taking care of oneself is very important. Only if we are happy and at peace with ourselves we can make our environment lovable.

 

images2

 

Believe it or not, self-investment does reap rich dividends. Loving yourself is not vanity, but it is sanity.  It is an honest letter to myself.

 

Dear Me,

 Let me first wish you all the love, luck and happiness in the years to come. 2016 had been a great year in all terms for you. I know you would not want to look back, for the resentful experience life had given you. You are secure, comfortable and pleased with the choices you have made in the last years. I know you are happy with the life you have lived, the dreams you have realized, the love you have created and the kids you have. Nothing is comparable to the affection of the kids you are getting. I am sure your conscience rests easy.

 I love how you have captured various appealing and engaging capacity over the years. From an impetuous, spontaneous, dogmatic, academic girl to a confident, self-reliant, independent woman you have come a long way. You have always been inquisitive, opinionated with multiple interests. You are a great company to be with, how easily you mingle with people.

 Sometimes you have been a bit head-strong, but I don’t think there is anything wrong if it is related to the decisions for yourself. The callibre of learning a bit about everything is the most I like about you. You have never given up on your morals, values and principles and kept them alive in your kids. You have lived life on your own terms. Do you remember how much you have laughed and then cried on things from the birth of your daughter to the love of your husband. I remember it all. The joyous moments, incredible love!!

 You are happy even today with those wrinkles, dark circles and the extra flesh on your body. You are scared of silly things even today. You give it all in raising your kids and being a decent human being.

Always remember you are Wonderful and Unique in your own ways!!!

 All good wishes for a healthy and happy life.

love you always

SHWETA

My life my choice

Somethings are really free in this world. And No, I am not talking about love, luck or destiny here. I am pointing out to that community or class of people who are never too busy or hesitant to share their piece of FREE ADVICE.

You just step out of your house and you meet your so-called well-wishers, just waiting to pounce their opinion and suggestions on any topic or issue. Yes, and they don’t even charge you for this, the nonessential consultation is just free of cost. You can catch or connect this species wherever you go. Not necessary to meet them in person, privileged on phone calls as well.

 

DON’T JUDGE MY CHOICES, WITHOUT UNDERSTANDING MY REASONS. DON’T WORRY ABOUT WHAT I’M DOING, WORRY ABOUT WHY YOU’RE WORRIED ABOUT WHAT I’M DOING.

advice

You must be wondering why am I criticizing them and why is there so much dislike for them. It is just because recently I have confronted them in bulk. But there is no kind of animosity or hatred, just that, it is annoying. At times you leave the house for a cheerful evening walk or some fresh air, but come back home resentful, irritated and argumentative.

I suppose it is no one’s fault. Neither the one who is advising, because this is genuinely done by them out of gratitude, nor your, because you are bound to be genuine to listen to all that crap.

“Don’t you feed your kids? Why are they so thin?”

“Give them this and give them that…blah blah…”

“What do you earn while working from home? Is it enough for yourself and your kids?”

“oh my God !! you have two kids and they are daughters…. God had been biased for you… one son could have changed your life !! “

These are all face-to-face conversations I have had in the past. They are harsh, annoying and relentless. Every decision is insanely analyzed. The offensive aunties or your same age women never miss an opportunity to bring you down. May be this is the only way to make them feel good about themselves. Perhaps they are idle, with really low self-esteem.

cat

Whatever be it, I have started fighting back. No one will say something rude or intrusive about me and my kids and expect to get away. I will give it back, sometimes sarcastically, at other times in an amusing retorts. And the underlying message would always be, “Mind Your Own Business”.

“My life,My Choice”. If you have a problem with that then keep it to yourself. Unless of course, you are planning to raise my kids, pay my bills, run my home, I have no interest in hearing what you think about my life choices.

It is a fact accepted by me that some people will remain morons, and I should stop being effected by them.

If your strength is small, don’t carry heavy burdens. If your words are worthless, don’t give advice.


 Bottom line: If my actions don’t concern you…..don’t concern yourself with my actions.

Unlimited FUN without poking your pockets

There can be nothing more exciting than looking forward to the weekends. My little girl wishes the weeks to be just five days where she can plan for three days school and two days unlimited fun on the weekend. She is well aware that mamma is surely going to plan something great for the weekend and I do. I make sure kids are not glued to the screen or spend an unplanned day which may leave them feel dis-organized and overwhelmed. Keeping most of the day unchanged and in routine like the week days I always try to plan an outing with kids.

This weekend we went to Sarasbaug,which is the heart of the city (Pune) and also houses a famous Ganesh Temple also known as Talyatla Ganpati. Thousands of devotees visit the temple daily and the number goes up on occasions and special days. After a little time spent inside the temple we headed towards the adjoining garden area.It is a big garden space with a few swings for children to play and an artificial lake. The lake also has a fountain. The trees and the grass are well maintained. Kids enjoyed playing for some time there, we took the badminton racquets and a ball. After spending about an hour in the greenery we moved out near the adjoining food joints.

Parking for four wheeler is a little problem but as we went there in a cab, it was easy for us.

As we entered the so called “Chaupati” area we could see huge giant wheel and other rides like Columbus, Mary-go-round, Tora-Tora and a few for small kids also, like the Chhota Bheem train and small car ride. The stall honchos rush towards the customer to lead them to their respective stalls. One can imagine the Chaupati similar to the Mumbai Chaupati. There are lots of food joints serving Bhel puri, Paani puri, Pav bhaji and other delicious eateries. They are serving the best chat varieties and other quick-bites including Chinese, South Indian and fast foods dishes. I personally suggest the bhel and pav bhaji, the must-haves and relished by us. Kids bought ballons and candy floss. I had my favorite sweetcorn. As the sun was setting the lights in the area made it a bright and gleamy affair. I could see kids enjoying every bit.

This is a centrally located place in the city, just a kilometer away from the main Swargate bus stand. Commuting is not a problem due to easily available bus and auto-rickshaw services. It proved to be a great place for kids to spend time and take rides. The climate was also one of the factors we enjoyed the outing. The day was spent well within a budget of 5-6 hundred rupees, of course excluding our cab ride to and fro.

My girls are ready to spend another day there, playing and enjoying rides. Being a single parent I want to ensure my girls are getting their share of fun moments like any other child with both parents around. My motto is to guarantee fun and joyful moments as memories and create a strong bond as siblings and as mother-daughter accord. So I keep trying to make the weekends more energizing, wonderful and entertaining.

The much needed “ME-TIME”

I think I have been doing too much and close to my limits. I have been worrying and disheartened enough, not taking time out for myself, maybe. Sometimes you feel so low that even a little thing can bring in the emotional turmoil. People around you actually notice the frustration. I think that’s clearly not fair to starve yourself of some “me-time”.

Everyday we feed our ourselves, our families, our kids and sometimes our friends. But we forget to remember to feed our soul.

Today was that day for me. I woke up early and finished things. Felt contented and convinced. Then had a nap in the afternoon. Went to my friend’s house for tea. Spent sometime in a quiet house with my friend. Talked over that cup of tea, lots and loads of things. Sharing my thoughts, cribbing about things, being a braggart. Not to mention our girly talks. Not worrying about what has happened and what is going to happen. I relaxed and I chatted. I need not mention what I have been stressed about.

 

feedyoursoul

 

What a wonderful time. Sometimes we need quiet and peace inside our minds and outside our bodies. No T.V, no door-bells, no kids. Only calm and hushed.

I suggest everyone to do what they need to feed their souls. Write or read, nap or chat, whatever it is that makes you cool, serene and peaceful. It is not a waste of time or being selfish. It is as much necessary as feeding your tummies. It leads to healthy relationships and healthy YOU within.

Feed your soul for the wholesomeness for your thoughts in any way or anywhere, at home, at play or at work. Feed your soul with good books, real friends or meditation. Its only about spending sometime of your own and gaining peace inside to fight more battles which are yet to come.

CHEERS

Ask Me the Time…..!!!

I have been disciplining my kids too much, I think. What goes in, comes back. The way I’ve been instructing them, my girls are learning well, especially the younger one. Many times in a day I am telling them the right time to do things pointing the watch and what it says, like “It’s eating time”, “It’s sleeping time”’, “It’s playing time” and blah blah blah. Today the little one was wearing her watch and here is our conversation :

ANIKA : Ask me what the time is.

Me : What time is it, ANIKA?

ANIKA : my watch says it’s ICE CREAM time. It says we have to eat the ICE CREAM right now. Can we?

Me : Uh..

ANIKA :

Me :

ANIKA :

Me :

ASHITA : (whispers) Say yes.

ME : (sisters conspiracy I’m sure) Hmmmm

Chit Chat

When you have a growing daughter, who develops her own thought process each day, you should always be ready for what comes next. Sometimes the kids leave us wondering and compel our minds to wish if what they say can be true  !!!!

Ashita : I wish you were more like me.

Me: In which way?

Ashita : In every way.

Me : Can you specify how?

Ashita : Like you could remain a kid, and play more with me.

Me : But then everyone has to grow and become adults.

Ashita : We would have had more fun, if you were a child.

Me : (sigh) I wish the same baby.

(This way I would have stayed away from the realities and the dark secrets of the world)